new therapist, same challenges

We have now moved to Utah.  Actually, we've been here a year almost!  Wow, time flies.  With a little guy who likes consistency and structure, the move to Utah has been challenging.  To say the least.  It has been hard on Isaac, hard on Anne and the kids, and hard on me.  I, especially, feel stressed because I really pushed the move to be closer to my work, our family, etc.  I felt it was the right thing for our family at the time.  But, things were so much easier and nicer for Isaac in Colorado.  He has declined in almost every aspect since the move.  I'm not sure if it's a lack of support and therapy, or if this is the normal ride for a kid with autism.  Regardless, it's cause me to be depressed and to really question whether the move was good for our family.  I guess when things don't go perfectly according to plan, it's easy to question.  My family has been troopers about the move, but I think everyone misses the clean air of Colorado, the friendly people, our beautiful home, the great ward, and just being outside of Utah.   Work is good.  But I'm the only one who benefits from that.  Anne and I were reminiscing yesterday about how close she was, in particular, to certain friends, and she hasn't got that yet.  Noone has.  I suppose that's why friends, true friends, are worth their weight in gold.  They don't come every day, or every year, or even every decade.  They're hard to find, and even harder to keep with how busy life can get.

I digress.  Now, on to Isaac.  We are having a therapist come in 4 or 5 days/week.  She will be coming in to help Isie after school for a few hours each day, with a total of 10 hours/week.  This gal's name is Hannah Peterson.  She's a recent high school graduate, and is starting school at the U with an interest in special ed.  She will be mentored by Scott Pryor.  He was used by a friend at Intermountain (Kurt Peterson) who also had a son with autism.

Isaac is a complex little guy.  He seems to be doing well with his behavior at school.  He follows directions, doesn't hit/kick people very often, and is fairly amiable.  He struggles to socialize with the other kids, and his learning gap in all subjects seems to be widening.  I don't enjoy parent teacher conferences because the gaps seem to be getting wider and wider.  It's easy to lose hope for him in what his future might be.  At school, they have a great process set up where his behavior can "earn" certain levels.  For example, if he's very good, attentive, etc, he can earn a "blue" level.  A step down from that would be a green.  And so on and so fourth until he's finally at a red.  We've built in a reward system where 5 blues in a week (the whole week) and he gets ice cream with dad.   Whether it's the ice cream or the blue itself, he does really seem to be motivated.  This is encouraging.

But, with that great behavior at school, he is stimming and acting out at home more than I can remember.  It's been a struggle.  Perhaps he's using home as a relief valve after being so darn bottled up at school.  I don't know.  The other day I asked him why he struggles so much at home, constantly getting in mom's face, being sent to the garage, hitting/kicking/biting his brothers, etc.   He thought about it for a second and paused (he always pauses), and finally said "I don't get level drops at home".   We need to build our own reward system at home that can help reinforce and encourage good behavior.

Today, Lane Hill, one of his 3 Sunday teachers (who has a separate reward program for Isaac involving coins and OREO cookies) acknowledged that Isaac is extremely sensitive to peripheral noises, light, touching, etc.  But, he said he felt this hyper-sensitivity could be used for the gifts he believes Isaac can develop and share with the world.  So, instead of removing the sensitivity, we need to regulate it, but also redirect it to become a strength and allow him to focus in areas.  Who knows, he could be the next Einstein or Mozart.  So far, he seems to be very average (I love him no less though), but it's not up to me how God develops him.